Satire remains one of the only truly effective methods for dealing with hype, and if it’s one thing that needs a healthy dose of satire, it’s corporate-and-guru-driven webspeak.
Of course, satire’s most effective when it’s only one step removed from reality, which is why the Web Economy Bullshit Generator (at dack.com) offers so much entertainment value for so little time invested (it’s a synergistic hyper-relateable entertainment technology):
It automatically generates gibberish corporate-speak phrases (the button actually says “make bullshit”), including doozies like:
- disintermediate proactive technologies
- matrix virtual infrastructures
- strategize 24/365 web services
- incentivize plug-and-play infomediaries
- architect one-to-one infrastructures
- synthesize impactful channels
- grow cross-media infomediaries
Sadly, you could pack a corporate pitch/report with fertilizer like this and do just fine. But remember: That way lies madness.
In fact, the Undergrounders should feel free to add their own real-life corporatespeak phrases in the comments section (use fake names if you feel the need to protect yourself).
Me? I’m heading off to innovate enterprise functionalities so I can seize synergistic paradigms for my clients, who are currently incubating end-to-end user experiences.
Then I’m probably going straight to hell.
Keep writing, Tom Chandler.
As someone who’s always looking for a way to //harness leading-edge initiatives//, I found the Word Economy Bullshit Generator’s ability to //reinvent visionary infrastructures// at the click of the button quite impressive. The next time I’m struggling to mastermind a new strategy to //cultivate holistic experiences//, I’ll be sure to revisit the site.
Fun stuff! And not quite a full step removed from reality.
.-= Carson Brackney´s last blog ..Every Day in May… 2010 WordCount Blogathon =-.
This one’s going on the “Useful Resources” list. In fact, I plan to load it on my blackberry so I’ll be able to more than hold my own in those corporate meetings…
Sadly this is closer to the truth than many people would like to admit.
.-= Matthew Stibbe´s last blog ..Summer Internship at Articulate Marketing =-.
Today I’m doing some positive interfacing with a wholly owned subsidiary of mine, trying to find out if, through a co-mingling of ideas and the integration of old and new aerodynamic technologies, we really can get that tree by-product-produced, hand-to-air lift-engagement system to fly all the way across the house…
(Said subsidiary is now playing Wii while I have a coffee and pretend to get a couple hours of “work” in…)
~Graham
I’d have been more impressed if you were ideating…
Bah, ideating is for R&D and account planners. We’re more men of immediate progressive energistic tally-ho-wardness.
~Graham
So this is how the IRS architects ubiquitous paradigms! I finally understand!
.-= Chris Mower´s last blog ..You Want Me to Change?! Holy Smokes! =-.