Like anyone invested in their craft, I can only handle so much stupidity before the mental elastic parts with a snap.
And frankly, no writer could be blamed for howling a little after repeated, long-term exposure to the following:
Bad Social Media Copywriting.
This morning I received an email promising me “a chance to win a t-shirt” if I managed to convince the sizable readership of my fly fishing blog to “like” an organization’s Facebook page.
Wow. A “chance” at a t-shirt. That’s real motivation for a top blogger, who invests a great deal of effort creating original content for his readers.
Clearly, the marketers share my pain.
Worse was this email (also aimed at my fly fishing blog), which – to spare you undue suffering – is only reprinted in part:
Hope your doing well. You’re getting this email because you blog about stuff real guys like. And [name withheld to keep their traffic to a minimum] Whiskey is as real as it gets. We’re betting your readers will want to know about damn good whiskey from the most award-winning distillery in the world. We are writing to invite to participate in a contest we call “Blogging for the Buffalo.”
Wow. Possessive fail in word #2, and it scarcely got any better. (Note my restraint with “most award-winning distillery” or the idea that they know what “real” guys like.)
The rest of the email is similarly challenged – as was the landing page (maybe a visit to one of Roberta Rosenberg’s Landing Page makeovers is in order).
Sadly, they caught me at the wrong moment, and this is what they got in return:
Wow. Goose bumps are rippling up and down my naughty bits.
I simply can’t wait to send my hard-earned blog readership to an anonymous, marketing-challenged distillery I’ve never heard of – and absolutely thrilled with the very real prospect of receiving little or nothing in return.
What thoughtful blogger – at least one capable of building a category-leading blog – could say “no” to a once-in-a-lifetime deal like that?
That I’m being asked to do your marketing heavy lifting for you via an error-ridden email only heightens the giddy anticipation; Social Media Experts know nothing screams “authenticity” like repeated grammar errors, caveman-esque syntax, and yes – Excessive Exclamation Syndrome!!
That your landing page continues the parade of errors only assures me that – as your email suggested – it was built by “real guys” (just like me).
Party on, The Trout Underground.
Social media represents a large (and growing) target; the hype is often unconscionable, and the low-bid implementations regularly fall below the just-invented “Laughability Line.”
I once considered launching a “Social Media Hall of Shame” blog highlighting the worst examples of social media buffoonery, but I (thankfully) realized no marketer could long expose himself to that kind of radioactivity without quickly accumulating a lethal dose.
Unfortunately, the trend seems to be accelerating. Unintentionally hilarious spam subject lines used to provide the majority of the amusement, but social media gaffes are quickly displacing it. And as quickly as you delete/glass over/ignore it, more takes its place.
Keep writing (but please, try to do it well), Tom Chandler.
I love it!
Although I am jealous. I’d have whored my blog out for Whisky, but usually all I get is badly worded SEO pitches from the subcontinent.
With any luck, you’ll soon find yourself buried under an avalanche of uninteresting contest offers, poor grammar, and – a personal favorite – social media “pros” who repeatedly mail you the same offer, then follow up with a demand that you respond.
No doubt you’re giddy with anticipation.
Hey Tom,
> “Is There Any Reason Social Media Copywriting Has to Suck Like a Hoover?”
I used to do quite a bit of SEO writing, until most of it went to $1-per-page scramblers who “must have five pages written per day, no excuses, no weekends off.”
My point is, I’m not sure if it’s “social media writing” per se that is sucking, just that social media has hit that point in its progression that companies with no budgets are doing what they can with as little as they can. In other words, they’re using the $1-per-page salt mine workers.
I was talking about this with fellow writer friends the other night: the web has certainly “democratized” writing. But the downside is that a lot of writing comes to light that perhaps shouldn’t have.
And, perhaps more crucially, fewer pairs of eyes look at it before it comes to light, which will always lead to more typos. (I myself have been guilty of this one on occasion — I think most bloggers have…)
On the other hand, I wonder how successful this campaign was? I’m finding that fewer people these days care about typos. Perhaps some bloggers out there saw “whiskey” and “free t-shirt” and thought “What the hell, why not?”. This would be easy to track — just set up a Google Alert for the name of the whiskey, and see what pops up…
(Someone should split-test typo-ridden landing pages with corrected ones and see if there is a difference in results… Perhaps it’s already been done?)
~Graham
You’re right, though I think a big chunk of this nonsense is driven by the idea that “social media is free.”
It’s as much a crock as “information wants to be free” but sadly, it’s widely accepted as truth.
Still, the distillery offered up a relatively professionally done microsite, so I have to assume the plan, messaging, offer and copy were in the hands of someone who isn’t a copywriter (at least not recognizably so).
The intern? Somebody’s nephew? The janitor?
Or just in the hands of one of the $1/hour slaves you mentioned?
I get twisted by the horrifying copy that accompanies so many of these marketing schemes, but in truth, most of them fail on the basics – the same basics that guided us when creating direct response campaigns literally decades ago.
Direct response used to be expensive, and when the price of failure is high, more care is applied to the process.
Given the (ahem) affordable nature of social media, I get the impression a lot of the campaigns are throwaways – things created on the fly with few expectations of success, and a spaghetti-thrower’s hope that something goes viral.
In any case, your comment has given me an idea for another post. Maybe next week…
TC
Yes, I think you’re right — the perception that social media campaigns can be rolled out for less than, say, a commercial during the Super Bowl or a full-fledged direct mail campaign certainly allows more hit-or-miss experimentation. I think the easier access to social media also brings a different type of company to the table, one that wouldn’t necessarily invest in a proper marketing campaign anyway.
“…a spaghetti-thrower’s hope that something goes viral.” – exactly. It’s like the investor putting together a solid plan for the long haul vs. the guy who wants to hit it big with a “hot stock” or a lottery ticket.
Problem is, enough of those long shots hit to keep the dream alive…
~Graham
Graham, I know businesses that think they can roll out a social media campaign for the price of the two cups of coffee you’d have to buy at the coffee shop to get free wi-fi.
The technology changes, but the basics don’t…
Maybe they did a focus group with “real guys” and found that they enjoy typos with their whiskey. The free t-shirt was just the icing on the cake.
this post was hilarious, by the way!
The “real guys can’t spell” angle occurred to me when I first opened the email, but it doesn’t really pass the sniff test.
I vote for clueless.
Thanks. Bad social media marketers deserve some of the credit…
It’s weird – large companies would never allow someone from the typing pool to design a billboard campaign. But they’re happy to let anyone have a go at the company Facebook presence. With disastrous results.
True: you don’t hear “Let’s hand that broadcast campaign to the intern” in too many marketing departments.
Then again, most social media campaigns haven’t produced as hyped, so…
Bad writing – and brainless marketing spam – are as old as Larry King. It has pained me throughout my writing life to read (or try not to read) the tripe that explodes from mass mail that STILL fills my snail mail box. No, I don’t want a free rubber chicken to listen to your wealth-management seminar, and I have NEVER eaten your hamburger, let alone desired two for one. And whyo why do even the most reputable non-profits waste my donation on 15 insert – do studies show that I might prefer one shape or color over another, so you throw them all at me?
Or how about the technique that goes, “will you talk to your neighbors and ask them for just $2? We can save the world, blah blah blah.”
My point – this isn’t just about “free” social media, it’s about spray-marketing and it’s been around forever. The dang thing is, it apparently works. Which makes it hard to raise your hourly rate, doesn’t it? Bummer.
You’re right that bad mass marketing has existed forever, though the higher costs of advertising & direct mail kept a lot of potentially awful work off the airwaves and in the trash can where it belonged.
Social media entry costs are damned low, which lowers risk considerably, opening the “should never have seen the light of day” floodgates a considerable amount – the same way desktop publishing opened the floodgates to bad typography and design.
You have hit upon one of my pet peeves—-writing carelessly. Anyone can grab a grammar book or a copy of Strunk and White’s, and at least make an effort to write properly, but most people obviously do not. And I don’t think this phenomenon is limited to social media marketing. I think it’s liberally scattered not only throughout the World Wide Web, but also throughout all areas and professions.
Facebook status updates and comments, Twitter quotes, blog comments, even published news articles by supposed professionals—-all are subject to misspellings, lack of correct punctuation and basic grammatical errors. I believe the large majority of our society does not know when to use its or it’s, or how to use a semi-colon or an apostrophe, or the difference in their and there or effect and affect. How will this trend affect our future writers, and what effect will their lack of proper grammar have on the Web and its expanded influence on all things?
@Rebecca – I think you hit it on the head. Spelling isn’t and grammar isn’t just getting worse, it’s also showing more. Twenty years ago, 95% of the population did not write on a daily basis. Now, 95% do*, be it texts or emails or whatever. So not only are non-writers writing more, their writing is more public.
I’m perfectly willing to let these things pass. Grammar – especially English grammar – is a talent and an art, not a science. I don’t expect everyone to be able to pick up a pen and use it well.
(If suddenly I had to talk to people via square roots and cosines, no number of Strunk-and-White equivalents would ever make me fluent in that language…)
It’s the paid-for writing that makes me sad. Everyone has the occasional slip, but sometimes you just have to shake your head and say “come on…”
~Graham
*Note, these numbers are totally made up, but you get the point…
@Graham — you make a good point and I’m probably being too hard on non-professional writers. Not everyone has the ability to write well with ease and I’m right there with you on the lack of fluency in math-speak. But it does seem a shame that some professional writers do not take enough pride in their work to make sure it’s done correctly.
I’m a student in a master’s level professional writing program at Kennesaw State University, and for my web writing class we have been assigned to comment on a writer’s blog each week. Perhaps the best advice we will glean from this blog is to check our work and be diligent. Thanks for your insight,
Rebecca
Rebecca; I share some of your discontent with many of the “professional” writers working in the business, but in truth, what constitutes a “professional” in the connected age is unclear at best, and scandalous at worst.
Clients are ultimately responsible for their own marketing, and why some let fools market for them suggests a difficult future.
Your comment is much broader than my focus here (“professional” social media marketing), and I can’t comment on the implications of “R U thr yt?” on society at large, though I will say it’s ugly, but I doubt the apocalypse is imminent.
Just for fun, another social media winner today – this one aimed at “top” writers: